Looking For Money Quotes Funny?
“When people ask me if I have any spare change, I tell them I have it at home in my spare wallet.”-Nick Arnette
“Someone stole all my credit cards, but I won’t be reporting it. The thief spends less than my wife did.” -Henny Youngman
“If hard work were such a wonderful thing, surely the rich would have kept it all to themselves.” -Lane Kirkland
“Carpe per diem – seize the check.” – Robin Williams
“Ah, yes, divorce … from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet” — Robin Williams
“It’s money. I remember it from when I was single” — Billy Crystal
“There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage” — James Holt McGavran
“I made my money the old-fashioned way. I was very nice to a wealthy relative right before he died” — Malcolm Forbes
“Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit” — George Carlin
“I put a dollar in one of those change machines. Nothing changed” — George Carlin
“Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.” — Steven Wright
“I just filled out my income tax forms. Who says you can’t get killed by a blank?” — Milton Berle
“It’s amazing how fast later comes when you buy now!” — Milton Berle
“If you’re given a choice between money and sex appeal, take the money. As you get older, the money will become your sex appeal.” — Katherine Hepburn
“A father is someone who carries pictures in his wallet where his money used to be” — unknown
“What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? The taxidermist takes only your skin” –Mark Twain
“Economists report that a college education adds many thousands of dollars to a man’s lifetime income – which he then spends sending his son to college.” — Bill Vaughn
Funny Money Quotes and Inspirational Sayings
“I’m tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money. I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.” — Shaquille O’Neal
“It’s easy to meet expenses – everywhere we go, there they are.” — Anonymous
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